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About Starshine

Starshine started this conversation

Like everyone here we have our own story to be told. There is the ying and yang of life some have it better others worse.

I almost died when I was 4 they told my parents don't expect me to live as it wasn't known but the measles were breaking out inside me. I can remember one janitor at night when I was in isolation had more common sense and it was midnight. He heard me cry and came to the closed door asking what was wrong. I told him I wanted my mom and he said he would call her and my dad. That was all I needed and years later I told my mom this, she told me we never got a call from anyone. My folks and my sister had to stand on crates to barely see me in the hospital. Mom when I did get out and loved levi jeans lived in them would tell me if you ever die I am going to bury you in them. I later figured out why she said that as I came close to dying then and when I was 24 from the birth control pills, got a deep vein clot and more. So I later became prone to leg ulcers and standing at my old job was a big factor in getting them.

I am not big on birth control pills and mine was low dosage as when I had my clot long ago my doctor told me a lot of doctors won't let their wives use them as they see what happens when one does. I had a friend who almost bleed to death from them and another her sister had heart attack at age 32 and died. My sister stopped when they took two cups of fluid from off the under part of my left lung that was the color of tea and thought I had clots in my lung so had to have heart catherization to be sure you didn't in the frankstein operating room and you got to be awake for that. Then seven days later came my leg swelled up and I spent from 7pm to 11pm before a doctor saw me and I was just dragging my leg. He told me you aren't going anywhere.You have a deep vein clot. 

Home life growing up was fun to an extent. Dad was physically abusive to me and mom. That didn't help much in the anxiety department or self esteem department and I had neck jerks. I saw a shrink on my own who just listened and dad freaked when the bill was sent to the house as it wasn't suppose to and forbid me to see him till I was 21. When I turned 21 went to see this shrink again , no medicine and he said he was from Canada and people here think you are nuts if you see one!

I would help out at mom's hair shop after school and the weekends to get away from my dad. I could not wait to move when I late in the 70's to the beach as I always loved it and never had hayfever there!!

I saw a homeopathic doctor in 1985 as no one could help with an ear injury I had. Then he referred me to a lady in Santa Barbara. This lady told me I had a rough life. I never thought of my life being rough.I had more going on than what I mentioned. I had anxiety and panic attacks as a kid from 10-12 yrs old then when I used ear plugs and pushed too hard the room spun two times. I spent two years and my savings trying to get help I have had $200 to my name and then $7 in checking when I later went through my divorce but I had a job, now I don't. 

At the age 38-40 I had anxiety attacks and panic attacks so bad from stress of a supervisor coming after me for my job. The orginazation a big one I won't mention. It would not be till I was 40 when it hit the hardest. It change my appetite and took years to get in the car and drive on the freeway as I would just bottom out in hunger department. I went to normal appetite and weight of 138 to 145 and then to 135 later. 

Oh when I was 39 I heard Stevie Ray Vaughan and Double Trouble and later saw them in concert. I got to met Stevie and Reese getting their autographs and my pic with Stevie then saw them again in Dec 89. That night panic attack happen luckly I had food snack Fritos to eat and had the chance to meet him again but didn't. I started guitar lessons then year later my teacher left after Stevies death months later and it was bitter sweet to play again. His death knocked me to the ground. As the band was no more. After that everything went down hill.

Oh, I have been to San Franisco, Big Sur, Carmel and Marin county which I love. Mill Valley love it. My dad made sure we saw a lot even sleeping in car at night and going in a restruant to clean up. Back then safe to do so. I saw a lot of places but mostly due to dad or my sister living in Northern California.

So when I see someone here going through hard times mentally, physically or fianancially I can relate and try to post in my post what I learned which will be updated soon as mine got lost and so did I for a while from aidpage. I joined in November 2008. 

I have help a lady at Jack in the Box who had a coke when I was let go of my job. I could see her in me and doesn't take much to be where she was. After much going in and out and how to approach her to offer her money as others passed her by. She was shaking and a small coke wasn't helping. I gave her money telling get some food for yourself and her brown eyes looked up saying thank you. I went to my car and bawled as how could this happen in the U.S.? It will still make me cry. I would look for her when I had to go down there and never saw her again. I have helped other homeless people not as much as I would have liked to due to money.

I know this posting is not in chronological order according to years but I am not changing it.

I have met people who knew people in the rocknroll biz, trainded horses for the movie Seabuscuit and had a blast while he was alive seeing him with the horses and my folks took us to the Santa Anita track every weekend so I fell in love with horses. 

I had fun at the beach till I moved back home to learn something else and mom got sick with cancer and died. I wish I would have stayed at the beach as when I moved I knew it wasn't a good thing. Glad I got to be with mom more but two women in the same house with their own way of doing things in the kitchen clash. 

I just hope I can find work soon as this is a big stress for a lot of us. And thank you soulight forver as I would have never saw aidpage if hadn't seen you when I google need help with rent etc as I knew I would have to move from deceased mom's house soon back in November 2008 when I orginally joined. Never left, glitch in computer removed me Sunday the 19 of July 2009 and Emil and AidpageTeam worked hard to get me back on.

Sometimes I know we feel like we are running on empty but have to keep the tank half full.

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sandra35   in reply to san47
Yes! Starshine passed away a few years ago... Along with 2 other people I know here that has passed about the same time... I agree, So sad:( Starshine would call me So many time on the phone... Starshine loved her cat. She and I would talk hours on the phone... She was Truly a wonderful lady... I miss her too...

By the way, pleased to meet you!! I just signed back on here a few weeks ago. So happy to of joined back here.. I noticed we have a few more new family members here... Aidpage is the BEST site on the internet... Our family here cares and shares their feelings... I hope you have found Aidpage to be a blessing to You, like it has been for Me...

Hope you have a wonderful day!!! Take care, sAndra35
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san47   in reply to sandra35
Oh no starshine passed away?
I came back just to talk to her
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Cat lady 197343
I need help paying a deposit for turning on electric at my new address. I have been homeless for 1 1/2 years . I'm on ssi. I have found a home and have worked out the rent for the rest of the month. I only need $340.00 for a electric deposit.
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littlelacie   in reply to bondo77
you are very welcome.
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bondo77   in reply to littlelacie
already been their lots of help with food but not rent. Thanks
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littlelacie   in reply to bondo77
get on internet,type in needhelppayingbills,city,county, will then see a list of resources in your area that may be able to help,if they got the funds.
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Hi was laid off back in Nov. 2014 after 21 years. Have been looking for work. But i have some health issues. All my unemployment has ran out. Has of Aug. 1st i am 2 months behind on my rent. I think i am closest to get a job. But need help now. Thanks wish me good luck.
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sandra35   in reply to Glory Be
Mr K. So happy you responded to my sad message about Starshine. Losing her is a huge loss. Everyone of our families here are an importance. We are a family growing and I believe Aidpage is the best site on the Internet. So pleased that you responded. Hope you and your family are doing well. "Life is about people". Again thanks for your response. We would hope you tell others about Aidpage. We have room for more (people). Thank YOU!! Sandra35
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Glory Be   in reply to sandra35
Yes, I knew her also. She gave her all here. She will not be forgotten.
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To everyone here on Aidpage. Our dear friend Starshine had passed away last year. Starshine was a family member here on Aidpage. Those that knew her, liked her. I knew Starshine here sense 2010. Starshine was always here to give great advice and she lived LIFE to its fullest. Today and always I will miss her and hope her family is adjusting. Life is short!! May the LORD be with YOU ALL. God bless!! Sandra35
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Hello I am a hard working person but my check is not bringing me enough money to own my own apt or house which I so desperately need. I never had a stable home and I am 24 with no kids I been renting rooms and having room mates but no good has come from that. Now I am in a CNA program to try to find a better job but I need a stable safe home now and help finding a low income home which I can call my own and not have to worry about moving. I also come up with inventions and ideas but do not have the money or connections to get anything started . It feel like I am alone and will always feel like I am stuck. I need advice and a person I can talk to because I ran out of ways to live and earn money to make myself out if something
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Have a friend in Los Angeles that need help paying her rent. Who can assist her? She has received eviction notice?
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I'm a hard worker who is struggling financially at this point in my life. I need assistance with rent. I raised my 4 children for almost 10 years with no financial support from anyone. Unfortunately, this has also caused me to be in debt mostly due to medical bills that I've accrued. I have a daughter who had brain surgery in 2011 and my other daughter suffers from the affects of Lyme disease.I also had to take a lower paying job because of an eminent layoff last year. Accepting help through Microgiving -

Any help would be greatly appreciated
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The Christmas Cat   in reply to kimbslowe
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The Christmas Cat   in reply to kimbslowe
For all States
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Requests for Assistance: 1.866.649.5862 | Toll-Free 


U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development
451 7th Street S.W., Washington, DC 20410
Telephone: (202) 708-1112 TTY: (202) 708-1455
Find the address of the HUD office near you

Need Help Paying Bills, Debt, and Mortgage


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Administration for Children...
The Low Income Home Energy Assistance Program (LIHEAP) helps keep families safe and healthy through initiatives that assist families with energy costs.


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1800 Diagonal Road, Suite 600
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Tel: +1 203.658.9690
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I bought 4 pairs here they were nice but you must have a eye prescription and know
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Worldwide Clinical Trials Earn up to $2,300

Getting paid for for Disability or support care

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U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development
451 7th Street S.W., Washington, DC 20410
Telephone: (202) 708-1112 TTY: (202) 708-1455

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temporary mortgage assistance for unemployed or underemployed homeowners

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woman in a shoe   in reply to kimbslowe
hi look up help for u there was alot but i only wrote 2. the samarition community 225 9500 help rent and dep if they don't have the grant they will refer u somewhere else.2 baltimore homeless services can pay rent and dep 6- 18 mos first one phone number 225 9500. 2, phone number 462 2585 good luck are u can type need help baltimore maryland and there more info for rent and dep
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woman in a shoe   in reply to kimbslowe
sorry there no cash on this site. but there is places that will pay first mo rent and dep for u start with this one call 211 give city state tell them what u need help with they will give u a list of places to call. wefare also helps with rent and dep. why i am looking something up for u. u call 211. when i get done looking for u i will come back and let u know what i found it takes me a little while to type my right wrist is broke be back
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I need housing for me, my son & my dog i've called chruches talked to people & internet resources i still havent found anything. Can anybody help me we dont want to go back into shelters my son has a disabilty & its just hard All i want is a place i can call home me & my family i live in 21225, baltimore Maryland anyone can you help??
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singalot   in reply to TMS+RAB
Have you called some of your local churches, sometimes they have the means to help.
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Hello my name is Brittney and I am needing emediet help to pay a security deposit on a apartment, I am homeless with my husband and daughter and apartment owner is very kind and willing to work with me, she only wants us to $500 to move in by today. Can you please help. We are on aid!
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